My First Letter to My Daughter

Dear Sweet One,

Today was a very blessed day, we found out that you are officially a girl! I am overwhelmed with excitement as me and your dad were hoping a praying for a little girl. God is good! He knows the desires of our hearts and answers our prayers! (I also think that Great Grandma Koutsouros or "Yia Yia" had a little influence being face to face with the Lord. About the same time we found out we were pregnant with you, Yia Yia went to be with the Lord. She always said she would pray for a little girl for us.)

As I took some time this afternoon to run errands, the news of you really sank in. The reality that God was giving us you, brought me to tears. Ironically, at the same time the flood gates opened allowing fear to already take root in my heart.  I'm fearful of all the challenges that you will have to face as a women in this world of ours. More so, I'm fearful of how it will hold me accountable needing to be a model for you, finding my identity in the eyes of God and not in those of others or the world. It will be clear I won't be able to be a perfect example for you but by His grace he will reveal this to both of us over time and I pray his mercy will be apparent through my life. I'm already praying against those fears.

My dear daughter, you are fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. To me you are already so beautiful. You are so blessed and loved. God has great plans for you my loved one! You are a true gift, a true blessing.

I can't wait to meet you!

Love dearly,
Your mother

My Agenda & My Authority Disproved

Lord, in parenting I have made discipline about my authority and my agenda. I believed it was about me and lost sight of you. Help me to reflect YOUR authority as the moon reflects the sun (son). Isaiah will become an jmitator of me, but by me being an k mitator of the Holy One, may he unconciously be an imitator of you. Remind me to glorify you jn all I do. That's what God has designed me and my children to do.
Thank you Lord. May you work be done in my heart. By your sons death, this is possible because I am forgiven and it is finished. Thank you. May your mercy abound. Amen!

Lessons from the Life of Moses

Moses was a godly man, no other like him that saw God face to face. He was a man of faith, courage, obedience and intercession.

What did I learn this year in BSF?
1. God really does love his people, including me. God chose the Israelite to be his people and that he would bless them. End of promise. It is nothing they did, just his promise. God also desires for his people to be a holy people that worships and glorifies the one true God. We are to bring him glory in all that we do and each moment that he has given us on his earth. Lord, help me to bring you glory today. I have tried on my own and i just can't do it. Ive been living a life lacking fullness in your joy and glory. I have cut you short for the amazing and perfect God that you are. Jesus, will you put in my heart a desire to see you in every breath of life that I have been given. Help me to believe that you are worthy of glory each step of my way.

2. God, you cover me in royal robes as your atonement cover was designed to cover the 10 commandments, which could not be kept, in the ark. When you look down on me, you don't see the broken commandments, you see a child dressed and covered in royalty by the grace of Jesus Christ. Thank you! May I live humbled by your mercy and grace.
""LORD, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered--how fleeting my life is." Psalm 39:4

3. Moses lived and DIED well. I fear dying Lord because I fear mostly not living well. Help me to die each day to you so that jn the end I will live with you! Reveal to me what that looks like each day. I'm scared I will.miss you in the meticulous Ness of my day but Jesus, align my heart with the yours each day so you may get the glory today and in my last days.

Most of all, Lord, thank you for bringing me to BSF were you truth is taught. At the beginning of this year I struggled with Paul's declaration, "I'm not ashamed of the gospel because it is God's power for the salvation of all" Romans 1:8&9. I was ashamed of your gospel, jn teaching at a Christian school, amongst family and friends, among my father's death bed, and now as a parent trying to raise the next generation in the truth. What was I ashamed of? I was suppressing the truth in my own evil way. I also did not know the truth. I broke the first commandment by making for myself an idol of the God I thought you were. Now I seek to know the one true God, and in that truth I desire to find freedom as you promise. God, you promise if I seek you, you will be found. And this year has proven that your promise is true even for me. I'm finding out about the one true God and I'm so grateful you have put people in my life to pray for me during this journey, especially Ms. Liz Butler. May you bless her and Miss Teacher Carol, who have made this journey reality. Continue to reveal your truths as I press jn to them. Continue to put on my heart a desire to know the One True God and his Word.

I'm truly blessed. Thank you Lord! May you get all the honor and glory. Amen!